From Infertility to Adoption: Knowing When to Move Forward

When is the right time to move from infertility todeliver a healthy baby. I still had that when we
adoption? When do you emotionally feel ready? Willadopted. I don't necessarily think it wrong to have
you ever feel ready and must move forward withthat feeling.
other ways of creating your forever family! MardieWe have suffered seven pregnancy losses. We have
Caldwell, through her personal experience and overexperienced infertility, miscarriages, a fetal demise,
20 years of working with couples nation-wide, hasand a tubal pregnancy with twins. In between the
made it her life's work to bless children needinglosses, we did have one full term birth of our
forever adoptive parents.daughter. It is a hard call. I have always told my
How do couples decide to move forward in adoptionadoptive parents that they need to work on creating
as opposed to doing donor embryo or IVF?their family, and if they want to try infertility
We just had our third try with IVF with my owntreatments while trying to adoptive parents, they
eggs. Our doctor told us that I was a poor respondershould. I just couldn't imagine using birth control when
and the quality of my eggs is not good. He said ourtrying to adopt after all the effort of attempting to
only options are either with donor embryo orget pregnant, and I've never felt I should ask my
adoption. I am just trying to work through the lossprospective adoptive parents to do something I
of both a dream and of the babies we fertilized andwouldn't do.
trying to decide the best direction for us. I still haveJust a few years ago my OB-GYN gently said to me,
such a passionate desire to "carry life" in me, but I"Mardie, why are you doing this to your body?" in
am not sure if that will go away once I start thereference to all the pregnancies and then losing them.
adoption process or adopt. Does it? My fear withI know he just didn't understand the desire to give it
trying donor embryo is if it doesn't work, can I takeone last try. A few months later he discovered
another "failure" after all our losses. My fear withpre-cancerous cells in my uterus, and I underwent a
adoption is that it might take years or the adoptionhysterectomy shortly after that. Knowing I would
might keep falling through. My only experience withnever carry a child again was difficult.
adoption is a co-worker with an older child adoptionEven with my "oven" (or as my daughter calls it her
that has not been good. I realize there is no"first home") gone, I still have moments when I
guarantee with either path, but it is such a difficultexperience "signs of pregnancy" and forget it is not
decision, I am curious as to what led other adoptivepossible for me to carry a baby. After so many
parents to their decisions.years of wanting and trying and planning for babies,
Mardie's reply:old habits are hard to break.
We decided that it was more important for us to beI counsel prospective adoptive mothers to pray that
parents than to be pregnant. My biological clock wasif God doesn't want you to be a mother, He would
ticking, and we had to decide what we wanted mosttake the desire away. For me, the desire didn't leave
in our family.me, and we adopted our son. You need to be
We moved from infertility to adoption and then afterhonest with each other and find a medical
our first adoption of our son, we tried some mildprofessional whom you can trust. The chances of
infertility treatments again. We didn't have a lot ofsuccess in adoption are so much greater than with
money to do extensive infertility drugs orinfertility treatments. When comparing the cost of
procedures.infertility treatments and the cost of adoption, you
So, we decided that adoption was right for us. Thewill discover more help in financing and grants for
decision to adopt came surprisingly easy to both ofadoption than infertility. Though the emotional ups
us. We always wanted to adopt someday regardlessand downs are about the same, they vary depending
of whether or not we had any biological children. So,on the adoption route you take. Needless to say,
it was a true blessing for us.when you look down at a child in your arms and
The desire you mentioned about "carrying life" insidethose beautiful eyes are peering back up at you, and
of you is natural, and I think most women desire toyou know you are a mom-well, that is priceless.
conceive and see their pregnancy go to term andI always say - Don't give up; there is a baby for you!