The Most Important Stories You Tell

Stories can inspire or deceive; motivate oryour story is a victim story then you'll find problems.
manipulate; challenge or deflate; persuade or console;If it's about winning at working and achieving your
unite or divide; ignite or resolve; anger or connect.life's potential, you'll see challenges to meet. It's not
But, none of this is new news. Stories areabout the words, it's about your self-vision behind
everywhere, all the time. In the papers we read, inthem. How you see your life is how you live
the content we watch or listen to, and in the placesit.Sometimes we're not even aware of the stories
we frequent. That includes our workplaces. Andwe've adopted as our own. We've grown up hearing
we're all storytellers.The stories we choose to tellabout who we are, what we're like, what abilities we
about ourselves and others impact how we'rehave or don't have and we overlay those stories
perceived at work: team player or not team player;onto our life as our own. But here's the wonderful
victim or problem-solver; resilient or discouraged;thing about stories. We can write new ones.For much
approachable or distant. They impact what workof my life, a story I lived into was being quiet and
culture we help create: trusting or distrusting; silos orshy. It was true I was a very shy child, but I kept
teams; soul-enhancing or soul-depleting. And mostthe story alive as I grew older. At times, it kept me
importantly they impact how we see ourselves. Ouron the sidelines as a spectator to my life. But now I
choice of stories matter, increasing or decreasing ourfind that story confining, limiting and detrimental to
potential to be winning at working.But the mostthe work I want to do. So, I've let go of it and
important stories you tell at work are the ones youreplaced it with one that better fits this stage of
tell about yourself, to yourself. For me, one of thosewho I am and what I'm about. I've chosen a
is that I'm technically challenged. Okay, I know whatdifferent story to live into.You see, you have the
you're probably thinking and you're right. The more Ipower over your life story. Winning at working is a
tell myself the story of my technical incompetence,choice. What I learned in twenty years in
the more likely it is that my behavior lives up to mymanagement is this: people who are winning at
expectations. That's true on the reverse side, too.working realize they're the ones with the pen. They
Another self-story for my life is that I can invent theknow they're the author of their own work story
future that I want to face. In both cases, as T. Harvand they act accordingly. So, if they don't like how
Eker puts it, "You will live into your story."Kyletheir story is evolving, they create a better one and
Maynard is a good example. Before he was nineteenstart living it. They write their story as they go,
he was a Wrestling Hall of Famer with the impressivebuilding the outcome they desire.(c) 2006 Nan S.
title of the "World's Strongest Teen." He's been livingRussell. All rights reserved.Sign up to receive Nan's
into his story, summarized by the title of his book,free biweekly eColumn at Nan Russell has spent over
"No Excuses." You see, Kyle has a congenitaltwenty years in management, most recently with
condition called quadramenbral phocomelia. He has noQVC as a Vice President. She has held leadership
limbs below the elbows and knees. His becoming apositions in Human Resource Development,
wrestling champion goes beyond normally impressiveCommunication, Marketing and line Management. Nan
feats. But Kyle lives his "no excuses" story not onlyhas a B.A. from Stanford University and M.A. from
in the wrestling arena, but in all parts of his life,the University of Michigan. Currently working on her
learning to type fifty words a minute and drive afirst book, Winning at Working: 10 Lessons Shared,
car.What stories are you building your life around?Nan is a columnist, writer and speaker.
Are they enhancing your potential or minimizing it? If