From Infertility to Adoption: Knowing When to Move Forward

When is the right time to move from infertility toThe desire you mentioned about "carrying life" inside
adoption? When do you emotionally feel ready? Willof you is natural, and I think most women desire to
you ever feel ready and must move forward withconceive and see their pregnancy go to term and
other ways of creating your forever family! Mardiedeliver a healthy baby. I still had that when we
Caldwell, through her personal experience and overadopted. I don't necessarily think it wrong to have
20 years of working with couples nation-wide, hasthat feeling.
made it her life's work to bless children needingWe have suffered seven pregnancy losses. We have
forever adoptive parents.experienced infertility, miscarriages, a fetal demise,
When is the right time to move from infertility toand a tubal pregnancy with twins. In between the
adoption? When do you emotionally feel ready? Willlosses, we did have one full term birth of our
you ever feel ready and must move forward withdaughter. It is a hard call. I have always told my
other ways of creating your forever family! Mardieadoptive parents that they need to work on creating
Caldwell, through her personal experience and overtheir family, and if they want to try infertility
20 years of working with couples nation-wide, hastreatments while trying to adoptive parents, they
made it her life's work to bless children needingshould. I just couldn't imagine using birth control when
forever adoptive parents.trying to adopt after all the effort of attempting to
How do couples decide to move forward in adoptionget pregnant, and I've never felt I should ask my
as opposed to doing donor embryo or IVF?prospective adoptive parents to do something I
We just had our third try with IVF with my ownwouldn't do.
eggs. Our doctor told us that I was a poor responderJust a few years ago my OB-GYN gently said to me,
and the quality of my eggs is not good. He said our"Mardie, why are you doing this to your body?" in
only options are either with donor embryo orreference to all the pregnancies and then losing them.
adoption. I am just trying to work through the lossI know he just didn't understand the desire to give it
of both a dream and of the babies we fertilized andone last try. A few months later he discovered
trying to decide the best direction for us. I still havepre-cancerous cells in my uterus, and I underwent a
such a passionate desire to "carry life" in me, but Ihysterectomy shortly after that. Knowing I would
am not sure if that will go away once I start thenever carry a child again was difficult.
adoption process or adopt. Does it? My fear withEven with my "oven" (or as my daughter calls it her
trying donor embryo is if it doesn't work, can I take"first home") gone, I still have moments when I
another "failure" after all our losses. My fear withexperience "signs of pregnancy" and forget it is not
adoption is that it might take years or the adoptionpossible for me to carry a baby. After so many
might keep falling through. My only experience withyears of wanting and trying and planning for babies,
adoption is a co-worker with an older child adoptionold habits are hard to break. I counsel prospective
that has not been good. I realize there is noadoptive mothers to pray that if God doesn't want
guarantee with either path, but it is such a difficultyou to be a mother, He would take the desire away.
decision, I am curious as to what led other adoptiveFor me, the desire didn't leave me, and we adopted
parents to their decisions.our son. You need to be honest with each other and
Mardie's reply:find a medical professional whom you can trust. The
We decided that it was more important for us to bechances of success in adoption are so much greater
parents than to be pregnant. My biological clock wasthan with infertility treatments. When comparing the
ticking, and we had to decide what we wanted mostcost of infertility treatments and the cost of
in our family. We moved from infertility to adoptionadoption, you will discover more help in financing and
and then after our first adoption of our son, we triedgrants for adoption than infertility. Though the
some mild infertility treatments again. We didn't haveemotional ups and downs are about the same, they
a lot of money to do extensive infertility drugs orvary depending on the adoption route you take.
procedures. So, we decided that adoption was rightNeedless to say, when you look down at a child in
for us. The decision to adopt came surprisingly easyyour arms and those beautiful eyes are peering back
to both of us. We always wanted to adopt somedayup at you, and you know you are a mom-well, that is
regardless of whether or not we had any biologicalpriceless.
children. So, it was a true blessing for us.I always say - Don't give up; there is a baby for you!