Family Life in Christ

God ordained the Christian family to have a specificnormal outcome of the procreative act defrauds God
design - a man and a woman united in marriage,and falsifies the marital act. All such methods are
together with their children. The family is called themorally unacceptable (CCC #2370).
domestic church because it is a community of faith,It is impossible to live the sacramental life while
hope and charity. Within the family, we first learn toactively engaging in any contraceptive practices, for
respect the sanctity of life from conception towe knowingly defraud God of the result of a loving
natural death. This means welcoming children into theact due to our selfishness and sinful pride.Upon
marriage through birth or adoption but also learning toassuming the role of parents, we must remember
show reverence for the life of others such as thethat we have the "primordial and inalienable"
elderly, the infirm, the poor, the disabled, and theresponsibility for the education of our children (CCC
imprisoned.#2221-23). While we can delegate certain educational
Every member of the Christian family has aduties to a formal school, we cannot delegate
God-ordained function. Though equal in the sight ofresponsibility for oversight of our children's education.
God, men and women have entirely differentThe term "education" means more than just secular
responsibilities. As stated so clearly in the Catechism:studies, for home must be the place for
"Divine fatherhood is the source of humanevangelization and catechesis. First, we must give our
fatherhood..." which reaffirms the importance ofchildren a solid grounding in the virtues. Second, we
man's function as the head of the family. Thoughmust offer apprenticeship in self-mastery, self-denial
equal (as God) to the Father, Christ himself lived andand sound judgment, so they can learn to forego
died in supreme obedience to the will of the Father.pleasures in the spirit of Christian discipline. This helps
Throughout faith history, men have been called towiden their focus outside of the family in order to
leadership roles by God, from Adam to Noah tosee the needs of others. Third, education in the
David to Moses to Paul to Peter. This call toCatholic faith means creating an environment of
leadership does not necessarily infer perfection,personal and family prayer, participating in devotions
capability or skill, but the call is nonetheless intrinsic to(such as Enthronement, Adoration, Novenas, Stations
manhood. Pervasive gender-role confusion in ourof the Cross and the Rosary), attending Parish
society today makes it is easy to dismiss orMissions, and ensuring thorough Sacramental
compromise this primordial function of men to leadpreparation. Fourth, we must guide children in
their families to God.exploring potential vocations, especially being open to
To carry out their responsibility, men are to beGod's call to the priesthood or religious life. All of
servant leader of all in their charge. Leaders provide athese efforts point to the only true goal in the
clear vision, set a solid example, and help others ineducation of our children - to make them holy people.
their pursuit of holiness. Fathers must ensure thatAll of this responsibility may seem daunting to the
their children are brought up in the faith, the beginningaverage Catholic parent. Like any task, however, we
of which is their own life being one of Christiancan create hope by building a strategy for success.
holiness. Men who abdicate their leadershipConsider the following as a guide:
responsibility under some mistaken notion ofA. Set and Honor Priorities - Make it known that God
"sensitivity" bring disorder into the family and theis first in your life and let your decisions consistently
society. A simple review of crime statistics in our landreflect God's preeminent place. Ensure that the
reveals the terrible impact of fathers who ignored orfamily's choices regarding books, magazines,
minimized their prescribed role.entertainment, and clothing all reflect proper Christian
Woman's role as wife and mother differs from butvalues. Ensure that attendance at Mass on Sundays
complements that of the man. St. Paul reminds us ofand Holy Days (and especially while on vacation) is a
God's intent to provide a helpmate and partner tofamily priority. Let the family home proudly exhibit
man, "For man was not made from woman, butsigns and symbols of our faith.
woman from man. Neither was man created forB. Distinguish between Vocation and Occupation-
woman, but woman for man."(1 Cor 11: 8-9).Understand the distinction between "what we are"
Modeling themselves on the Blessed Mother, womenversus "what we do." Success in our vocation
are called to support and honor their husband's role(married, single or priest/religious) is our life's goal. Our
asleader of the family. In her function as wife andoccupation, on the other hand, is merely what we do
mother, a woman brings wonderful attributes such asto pay the bills. God cares deeply how we embrace
nurturing care, tenderness and compassion to familyour chosen vocation, whereas it matters little to Him
life. As with her husband, a wife is called to a life ofwhat field we choose to earn our daily bread. As any
holiness and Christian example.committed Catholic parent will affirm, it is infinitely
Children are called to proffer respect for parents outharder to live one's vocation than it is to succeed at
of gratitude for having given them the gift of lifea chosen occupation. Why? Because our vocation
(CCC #2216-2218)*. Respect is shown by docility anddemands that we give everything of ourselves, a
obedience to parents during one's childhood.notion that runs contrary to our culture. Does the
Obedience ceases with emancipation, but respectnext rung of the career ladder undergo prayerful
does not. Grown children are reminded to assist theirscrutiny for its impact on our chosen vocation or is it
aging parents as much as possible with material andweighed solely for its occupational benefits?
moral support, as well as in times of illness, lonelinessC. Embrace a Vigorous Sacramental Life - Continue to
and distress.foster a love of the Sacraments in your children once
Sacramental marriage is the foundation of the family.they initially receive by having the same level of
It is the gift of self, a gift that is freely given andcommitment yourself. Demand of yourself an
total in nature. The perpetual and exclusive bond ofever-higher standard of Christian behavior rather than
marriage creates the sanctuary wherein the securitysimply remaining at the same level year after year.
of the family rests. The sacred covenant finds itsStart a relationship with a spiritual director.
physical manifestation in the sexual intimacy of theD. Surround Yourself with Committed Catholic Families
marriage act between man and wife (CCC #2360;- Americans love "support groups," so why not as
also Tob 8: 4-9). Reflecting this covenant, thepart of our faith journey? Have the courage to
spouses' physical union honors the twofold end ofdiscontinue relationships if certain friends do not
marriage, which is to serve the good of the spousessupport your moral values. Make an active effort to
(the "unitive") and to be open to the transmission ofbe involved in parish life beyond the Sunday
life (the "procreative")."obligation." Be willing to be challenged by others more
Children are the supreme gift of marriage, in contrastadvanced in the faith to delve deeper into its
to our societal view which considers them a "right." Inmysteries.
our zeal to conceive a child at all costs, medicalE. Continue Your Education in the Catholic Faith -
science offers us numerous techniques that attemptConsider the last 10 books youhave read. Did they
to produce a child by the disassociation of husbandsupport or conflict with your faith values? Ensure that
and wife or the involvement of a third party (such asyour faith education includes doses of Scripture,
donation of sperm or ovum, surrogate uterus, orCatechism, Lives of the Saints, Papal Encyclicals,
in-vitro fertilization). These actions violate the child'sCouncil Documents and works of Spirituality.
right to be born of a loving act of father and mother.F. Actively Demonstrate Christian Service -
All such techniques are morally unacceptable (CCC #Remember that, "...a contented Christian does not
2376-77). It is impossible to live the sacramental lifeexist." We are called to mix it up with society and
while engaging in such practices, for we knowinglyfearlessly speak out against injustice, poverty and
introduce other persons and processes into the lovingwrongdoing. In short, being Catholic means being
act of procreation, an act that belongs rightly tocountercultural, just as Jesus was countercultural. Our
husband, wife and God.family life must reflect the admonition of St. James
The intentional spacing of children, if undertaken forthat, "...Faith without works is dead." (Jm 2:14) and
just reasons, also demands that we observe moralrender Christian service in a truly selfless way. Sincere
norms. Periodic continence (methods based onactions will instill in our children the importance of a life
self-observation and the use of infertile periods, suchfocused on service to others.
as Natural Family Planning) respects the individual"We are not called to success, just faithfulness."
spouses and offers a mutually supportive, naturalMother Teresa
means of spacing. On the other hand, artificial birth*Catechism of the Catholic Church, Second Edition.
control or any action which frustrates or thwarts the