The Third Party- Surrogacy and Postpartum Depression

Intended Parents have several concerns before,-Risk factors include previous major depression,
during and after they have a baby through surrogacy.psychosocial stress, inadequate social support, and
Some, but not all, have a great relationship with theirprevious premenstrual dysphoric disorder (If the
surrogate and worry how she is going to react oncesurrogate has had previous bouts with depression
the baby is born. Is she going to feel attached to theshe may not make a good candidate in the first
baby? Is she going to want to bond with the baby?place)
Is she going to feel used and lonely once she is no-Symptoms include depressed mood, tearfulness,
longer pregnant? These are very valid concerns forinability to enjoy pleasurable activities, trouble
the Intended Parents. These questions are part ofsleeping, fatigue, appetite problems, suicidal thoughts,
the reason a psychological evaluation is requiredfeelings of inadequacy as a parent, feelings of
before any medications or embryo transfers takerejection, and impaired concentration.
place; to allow the potential carrier to think about-Postpartum depression interferes with a woman's
these issues. However, even when IP's are at homeability to care for her baby. (Or in a surrogate's case,
with their newest family member, it's important thather own family).
they show their concern for their (now) pastThe causes of Postpartum Depression are the same
surrogate.in everyone who has just given birth...it can happen in
Although a surrogacy pregnancy is very differenta surrogate situation, to a birth mother who has
from having your own baby, some of the samegiven her child up for adoption or a mother who has
issues regarding Postpartum Depression are oftenplanned her pregnancy. As hormones play a huge role
magnified by the surrogacy arrangement. A surrogatein Postpartum Depression with levels of cortisol,
may not be worried about feeling detached from theestrogen, and progesterone decreasing significantly
baby but may, instead, feel lonely for her IP's.within 48 hours after delivery, some women can be
Remember that Intended Parents and the surrogate,very sensitive to these changes. Other risk factors
along with her family, have spent a huge amount ofmight include, but are not limited to, poor support
time building a relationship via phone, e-mail, and facesystem at home, conflict in relationships including a
time. Personal details and intimate experiences havesurrogacy relationship, feeling of loss of identity (she
been shared. (What is more intimate then carrying ais now a past surrogate and no longer in the
baby for someone else? Some IP's are even in thelime-light), feeling less attractive physically, pain and
Exam room when the embryos are transferred!)recovery of pregnancy with no baby in hand to
Let's toss the possibility of postpartum depressiondistract her, and feeling overwhelmed with enormity
into this already unusual situation and you can easilyof the birth "handing over of the baby" to the
imagine how a surrogate can end up feeling lost andIntended Parents.
confused after the birth. The message has been sentAlthough Intended Parents can be sensitive to the
that feeling detached at birth is a good thing which,needs of their now past surrogate by making an
by human nature, is not a normal emotion when aeffort to call, e-mail and check up on her in general,
baby is brought into this world. We want moms andthere are things that she can do to help herself. She
babies to bond...but in this case it isn't what theshould be setting realistic expectations for herself and
Intended Parents want to have happen unless it'sher recovery, try to avoid isolation, surround herself
them doing the bonding! Add on top of this the factwith supportive friends and family, make time for
that the Surrogate has become very attached to herherself and talk to other surrogates. If the
Intended Parents. Because communication usuallydepression lasts for longer than 2 weeks, she should
ramps up near the end of the pregnancy, with moretalk with her OB or midwife for recommendations.
phone calls, appointments and plans, IPs and theirThere are tests and medications available for severe
surrogate can be closer emotionally then ever before.postpartum depression.
Although the Surrogate is preparing her family for theRemember that Postpartum Depression in a
eventful day and the Intended Parents are checkingsurrogacy situation does not indicate that the match
their list to make sure all is in order on their end, theor relationship between the parties was flawed or
possibility of some sort of depression or even regretthat the surrogate wanted to "keep the baby"...every
sneaking in can take everyone involved by surprise.Intended Parents nightmare. Instead it is a medical
Let's take a look at some of the signs of postpartumside effect that can happen in any birth situation.
depression some of which are listed on eMedicineBeing concerned and aware of this possibility is not
Health:only wise but shows caring and respect for someone
-Postpartum Depression occurs in about 10-20% ofwho has offered the greatest gift to her Intended
women, usually within a few months of delivery.Parents, the gift of life.