Little Jokes Can Make Big Holes in a Relationship

Most of us who are married have been there. Sharingoffer up the excuse, "I was only teasing you; you
a nice conversation with another couple and the wifeknow I was not serious." Joking, more often times
or husband criticizes the other spouse or makes aleads to hurt feelings and leaves people around you
little dig towards the other. You don't really knowfeeling uncomfortable.
how to react, you feel embarrassed, so most of theThere are times you need to criticize your spouse, or
time you just offer up a little nervous laugh.confront them on something. Forethought, along with
Or maybe you are the spouse who has criticized ora private place and time is what is needed. The best
was criticized in front of others. Little jokes or digsmethod to implement is the "Five to One" Rule.
can make big holes in a marriage relationship. Parents* For every criticism you feel you need to tell your
of teenagers, I believe, find more opportunity forspouse about the relationship, think of five positive
these types of encounters. As a parent you arecomments to mention before the negative ones.
balancing being older, but trying to appear hip or* Uplift your spouse with your words when you are
younger. This often comes out in our conversations.in public, and be sensitive when approaching them in
One of the joys of having a teenager is theyprivate.
understand joking and they offer up their own jokes.* If you have a spouse that hurts you with their
I have found myself laughing hysterically with somecomments, go to them in private and tell them how
comment one of my sons made. But as parents weyou feel.
need to be an example of the fine line betweenI guarantee you, if you only speak positive towards
joking and criticizing. We do this by not criticizing oryour husband in public the chances he will do the
making digs towards the other spouse in public. Manysame greatly increases.