| Telling the truth can be risky. It is often difficult to | | | | Understanding this basic fact, shows how pointless it |
| find a balance between telling important truths and | | | | is to argue about what is "The Truth." "The Truth" |
| protecting the feelings and reputations of everyone | | | | simply does not exist. |
| involved. Not only that, but honest, well-intentioned | | | | * Know what is true for you, including the signals |
| people don't always agree about what is true. It may | | | | that you are unaware of some aspects of your own |
| seem easier to keep the truth to yourself than to | | | | truth. |
| cause a rift in an important relationship. | | | | Since you are the only one who knows what you |
| Understanding and using these principles will help you | | | | see, hear, feel, taste, or smell, it is important to pay |
| feel more confident about the choices you make and | | | | attention to that information. You may not |
| help you develop the skills you need to tell the truth | | | | understand why something is attractive or repulsive |
| with grace and skill. | | | | to you, but knowing that you have feelings about it |
| * Realize that your truth is not "The Truth," and | | | | is one way to help you make choices, including the |
| neither is anyone else's. | | | | choice to learn more about why you feel the way |
| You are unique. There is no one else in the world | | | | you do. |
| who has had exactly the same life experiences as | | | | When you were a child, others didn't necessarily |
| you. Your past experiences have a profound | | | | appreciate or agree with your expressions of what |
| influence upon how you see and understand your | | | | you liked or hated. In the course of becoming |
| world. | | | | civilized, you learned to stop paying attention to your |
| Since there is always more data coming at you than | | | | own truths. You then learned to pay attention to |
| you or anyone else could possibly process, your brain | | | | what others believed instead, and to invalidate things |
| screens out everything that it believes is irrelevant to | | | | about you that others did not like. |
| you. Your brain makes those instantaneous decisions | | | | Many adults cover their own uncomfortable and |
| based upon what it has previously learned is pleasant | | | | invalidated truths by doing things to keep their |
| or painful. That means that whatever you perceive | | | | attention away from their own experiences. |
| (your truth) is only a part of what is present. | | | | Mindlessly watching TV, overeating, smoking, |
| Anyone who has had a different life than you have | | | | overworking, alcohol and drug abuse, are all ways of |
| had (including your sisters, brothers, significant other, | | | | tuning out this awareness. |
| children, parents, co-workers, etc.) chooses | | | | Make a habit of using your favorite way of tuning |
| somewhat different things to screen out. Therefore, | | | | out as a signal to check in with yourself and learn |
| what they perceive as true (their truth) is bound to | | | | your own truth. |
| be different than your truth. | | | | |