EFT For Pain and Grief For a Birth Mother

Just forty minutes of EFT dissolved a lifetime of painEven though I was betrayed by my daughter's
and grief for a birth mother that I worked with, andparents, and they never even tried to keep to the
gave her back her life. I specialize in working withagreement that we made... and I choose to consider
adoptees and birth mothers, and would like to sharethat maybe they did what they did out of fear. The
a story about a birth-mom client that I recentlyemotional charge at this point was zero out of 10.
worked with. Nancy (not her real name) was birthNext we tapped on Nancy's feelings of sadness over
mother to a 16 year old daughter relinquished in whatnever getting the chance to see her daughter as she
was supposed to have been an open adoption.grew up, which she was supposed to have been able
An agreement was reached between Nancy and theto do.
adoptive parents which was supposed to haveEven though I feel deep sadness about missing out
provided for regular visits with the daughter thaton my daughter's entire childhood...
Nancy relinquished. Unfortunately, the state in whichHer emotional charge had initially been a 10 out of 10,
her daughter was adopted had no legal protection forbut several rounds of tapping bought that down to 4.
birth-moms in this situation. When the adoptiveEven though I have a well of sadness inside me
parents failed to follow through on the agreement,because I never got to see my daughter as she
Nancy had no recourse. She was denied visits withgrew up, and I feel like I can't start crying because
her daughter throughout her childhood, in spite of theI'd never stop... That round of tapping bought Nancy's
agreement.emotional charge down to zero.
Nancy spent 16 years being sad over the loss of herLast of all, we worked on Nancy's grief, which was
daughter, and feeling betrayed and very angry thatat a 10, using her own words.
the agreement that had been reached was neverEven though I'm full of grief because it feels like my
honored. This sadness, anger and betrayal toucheddaughter died, and nobody ever let me grieve that
every part of Nancy's life, and left her feelingloss...
frustrated and triggered by even the smallest issuesThree rounds on that bought her emotional charge
that arose concerning her daughter.down to 3 out of 10.
Nancy was desperate to find a way to take theEven though I'm full of grief over the loss of my
emotional charge out of these issues, and was willingdaughter, and nobody ever acknowledged that grief,
to give EFT a try. Using Nancy's words, we startedand that just made it harder for me... Now Nancy's
by tapping on:charge on the grief was zero.
Even though I'm full of anger at my daughter'sNancy's entire session took 40 minutes from start to
adoptive parents for betraying me...finish. At the end of that time, she said, "I can't
Three rounds of tapping bought the anger, whichbelieve how much better I'm feeling. I don't think I
was off the scale to begin with, down to a 4 on aneed to do any more tapping today".
scale of 0 to 10. Three more rounds of tappingWe scheduled a follow-up session for Nancy, but a
starting with, "Even though I'm mad as hell at myfew days beforehand, she called to tell me that she
daughter's parents and hate the way they treateddidn't feel that she needed any more sessions. She
me..." bought it down to zero, and left Nancy saying,indicated that she no longer went to "the dark
"Wow, this stuff is amazing!". From there we movedadoption place" any more, and was feeling happy,
on to betrayal:confident and empowered.
Even though I feel totally betrayed by my daughter'sDuring a three week follow-up call, Nancy indicated
parents... "that she felt so empowered that she had spoken to
That took the emotional charge from a level ofher daughter's adoptive parents and told them how
intensity of 10 down to a 7.she felt about the way in which they behaved. She is
Even though my daughter's parents betrayed me andnow happily planning to pursue a relationship with her
only cared about getting her and didn't care aboutdaughter.
me... which bought Nancy's emotional charge down toNot long after that she had a warm reunion with her
2.daughter.