A Child's Guide to Adoption

How is a family created? Most people think that aIf You Were Adopted Kids who were adopted are
family is made when a couple gives birth to children.no different than other kids. But if you were
But families can happen in many ways. In theadopted, you may have a little more on your mind
television show The Brady Bunch, the mother andthan your friends. Sometimes, learning you were
father get remarried, combining their two families intoadopted may make it hard for you to pay attention
one. Another way to create a family is by adoption.in school. Many kids who were adopted wonder
In legal terms, once a child is adopted, the adult whoabout their birth parents and why they didn't keep
adopted him is his parent. How is a family created?them. Sometimes they feel abandoned even if they
Most people think that a family is made when alove their parents and are happy in their home. They
couple gives birth to children. But families can happenmay also wonder where they came from and what
in many ways. In the television show The Bradynationalities they are. These feelings are normal and
Bunch, the mother and father get remarried,should be talked about with a parent or another adult
combining their two families into one. Another way towho you trust so you can put your mind at ease.
create a family is by adoption. In legal terms, once aSome kids do not find out they were adopted until
child is adopted, the adult who adopted him is histhey are older - sometimes not until they are adults
parent.themselves. Their parents might have put off telling
Why do people want to adopt children?them until they thought they would be able to better
There are probably as many reasons for wanting tounderstand or because they feared what their
adopt kids as there are children waiting to bereaction would be. Finding out later that they were
adopted. Some couples are not able to have childrenadopted can be more of an adjustment for an older
for medical reasons but still want to raise a family.child or adult. That's why experts say it's best to
Some single adults, although they don't have aexplain to a child that he or she was adopted when
partner or want to get married, desperately want tothey are around age 3 or 4, when they are first
be a parent. Other kids' parents might remarry andputting sentences together and can understand
their new stepparent might adopt them. Whatevercomplex things.
way a parent and child come together, whether it'sIf Your Brother or Sister Was Adopted If your
through birth, marriage, or adoption - a new family isparents had you, the so-called "real kid," does that
born.make your adopted brother or sister fake? Of
What's Adoption and How Does It Work? Thecourse not! Being adopted doesn't make a sibling any
process of adopting a kid can be pretty long andless real or part of the family. There is no question
involved. Some single adults and couples have to waitthat there are differences between you and your
for years to adopt a baby. People wanting to adoptbrother or sister. But there would be differences
go through extensive background checks including, inbetween you if you were both born into your family
some states, having their fingerprints sent to theas well. No two people are alike. Think how boring
Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI).that would be!
People who want to adopt kids also meet with socialThe facts are, your brother or sister - adopted or
workers or representatives from an adoption agencynot - is going to be a part of your life for a very long
who ask questions like why they want to adopt,time and you will rely on each other even more as
their attitudes toward children, and how they resolveyou get older. Talk to your adopted brother or sister
family disagreements. This process is needed so thatabout his or her concerns. You might be able to help
kids are placed in good homes where they can growhim or her sort out his or her feelings about being
up happy and loved.adopted or encourage him or her to talk to a parent
Why Do Kids Need to Be Adopted? Of course, theor another trusted adult. You might even suggest
financial side is only part of adoption. Babies and kidsthat you talk about the situation as a family.
are a huge responsibility and not everyone isIf Someone You Know Was Adopted If you find out
equipped to handle being a parent. If you've everthat someone you know, maybe a good friend, was
taken care of a puppy, you know that taking care ofadopted, there is no reason to treat them any
a pet can be very demanding, and they require lotsdifferently. Your friend is still the same person they
of attention. Taking care of a baby is probably awere the day before. If your friend wants or needs
hundred times more work! But this is only one ofto talk about their situation, listen. Your friend will
many reasons why there are so many kids waiting toprobably feel better just talking about his or her
be adopted.feelings, and by being a good listener, you've been a
In many cases, a young or single woman who givesgood friend. Knowing how your friend feels about
birth to a baby can't handle that responsibility so shetheir situation will allow you to stand up to anyone
makes an adoption plan for her baby. Other times,who tries to make fun of them for being different.
especially in the case of adoptions from otherAdoption can be hard to understand or even accept,
countries, there is war, sickness, or poverty, and abut it helps many people in lots of ways - parents
parent may believe that the baby would be betterwho may be unable to take care of kids can place
off in another country. Sometimes a kid's parentsthem with people who can, and kids without parents
may pass away and he needs to go to someonecan be part of a family.
else who can take care of him.